Top 10 Memoirs from The Fulmer Era????

[brothervoliver2]

Not the NCAA Championship or 5 SECE Titles. I'm looking for some real jewels that we got to laugh at through the years via Fulmer. I'll start this off:

1) For me, has to be Jr. and LuLu. IMO, this cannot be topped! That 1980's Starter jacket. The hair. That's probably the most farked picture in UT Football history! The look on their faces is priceless! And I don't know if any of you know this or not, but they showed up in Gainesville in 2004 or so and some guy on GatorCountry spotted them in his section and took a bunch of pictures of them. They were on GC at one time.

2) The Fainting Goat (aka James Banks). Still gets 'em every time!

3) The "firing" of Mark Bradley. Fulmer was such a meanie to work for. Bradley getting canned helped our program 10-fold.

4) Platinum Plus Pat Washington.

5) The Clawfence. Likely the biggest smoke and mirrors job that Fulmer pulled in order to buy himself some more time.

What else?

[RockyTopCam]

The Ainge flip in the endzone during the LSU game. He looked like he was throwing meat to attacking bears.


How about losing to FUCKING WYOMING at HOME.

[DeerPark]

Easy. The 03 Florida and Miami games (which we won both of, BTW) where Fulmer insisted on wearing the orange cotton shirt, causing the embarassing sweat stains under his man boobs made worse by the constant arm folding. I was giddy to win those games, but he was widely ridiculed on all the shows after that.

Side note: The adidas rep at the time, David was his name, begged and pleaded with Fulmer to wear the ClimaCool shirt that wouldn't have shown a stain, but he repeatedly refused, adding to the embarrassment.

[GiveHimSixMillion]

The Fulmer Drinking Game:

- 1 shot for every "obviously."
- 2 shots for every mention of "film" or "tape"
- 3 shots for "working like heck."
- 5 shots if he throws someone (player, assistant, etc.) under the bus.
- 5 shots for saying "we were x plays away ..."
- 7 shots if he invokes the arcane (e.g. "magic dust" or "crystal ball").

Oh, the memories ... or what I could remember, anyway.

[brothervoliver2]

The Ainge flip in the endzone during the LSU game. He looked like he was throwing meat to attacking bears.


How about losing to FUCKING WYOMING at HOME.

The Bouquet Toss! Yep, that's definitely Top 5. Great one!!!

[birminghamvol]

6) Jim Donnan "offending" the virgin ears of his daughter

7) That damn freaking "synergy stick" his Assness carried around in 1998

8) "Jimmys and Joes"

9) Vicky Fulmer going batt shitt Joey Buttafuoko on that late Knoxville K-town fish wrap writer

10) Vicky Fulmer massaging the shoulders of His DonutHoliness at the firing ... and giving every damn one of us the stink eye in the process.

[BrassVols]

Hilarious story. Thanks for relaying. I know the picture well....

[msvolfan]

Watching him on the fulmer show with arms folded and biting on bottom lip grimmace after another crappy showing on sat.

The bend over with hands on knees and his legs locked straight. Ex: the uf shit kicking of 2007

The red eye while ole vicky had the red arse at his firing, and half the players acting like horses arses.


Molder of men and grabber of cankles

[RockyTopCam]

One of the Florida loses it may have been Mannings JR year. When we were up by like 30 then wound up losing,

Losing to Memphis.

I wish more coaches would have cussed in front of Phillip's daughters he may have been the best coach ever. Donnan is the only coach he routinely laid the wood to.

[BrassVols]

have omitted these?

1. Getting served a subpoena at the SEC Media Days then being asked about it at the podium and denying he knew what it was.

2. Chickening out on going to the SEC Media days the year before that and being fined.

3. The "Me too" Damien Play call against ND in 04. Or was that just another communications mix up?

4. The meltdown against the Zookster's in his SEC debut -- couldn't execute a center-QB exchange

5. "I'm going to audit the entire program...".

6. The nationwide search for a new OC to replace Col Sanders...spanning Knox Co.

7. "Somebody talked me out of it".

8. A certain assistant banging a top booster's wife, breaking up their marriage and he didn't do anything about it!

9. 4th down play against UGA in Athens when PM ran into the line, couldn't go anywhere, so rolled out and found Nash for a TD.

10. Juicy Locke affair.

11. Getting called out by the Knox Co. DA's office for Phatlock PI antics.

12. Having two of his RBs suspended for parts of the 07 Bama game by Kurkie Rupert and not even knowing about it.

13. Offering the OC position to Spence not once but twice, who turned him down twice then got himself and Bowden fired halfway through Clemson's season.

[GiveHimSixMillion]

- Flummo's apology letter to the fans after 2005.

- Losing a game when we intercepted the ball 4 times and averaged more than 6 yards a carry on the ground.

- After the 2008 ass-submission to UFAG, Flummo saying that 95% of the fans have never played a sport. Which was echoed immediately thereafter by a certain wide receiver, namely he of the sideline laughing and text messaging to 15-year-old boys.

- Game against fake-USC in 2008. So much clapping, even for Clappy McFatass, along with a, "shit, my job is fucked," grimace the entire time his team was getting cold-cocked.

[GiveHimSixMillion]

8. A certain assistant banging a top booster's wife, breaking up their marriage and he didn't do anything about it!
Forgive my ignorance, but when did this happen and who was involved?

[TheDeeble]

So many mentioned....

Fulmer pulling his hat down over his face after the Florida beatdown last year. Someone made it into an avatar. Can't remember who though.

[real turf fan]

The near immortal words "We didn't just get stupid"

[gatewayghost]

This comment after the SC game last year.

"I've never had back to back losing seasons since I've been here"

[brothervoliver2]

Forgive my ignorance, but when did this happen and who was involved?

It was Duke Clement's wife in Memphis. Caldwell was a "friend of the family" and stayed with them on his recruiting trips to The Bluff City.

[WestcoastVol]

The Pat Washington booth at Platinum Plus.

Rick Clausen teabagging Phil on national TV after that crazy post-Katrina LSU game.

The first studio shot after the opening credits of The Phillip Fulmer Show after an ass-waxing when Kesling would try to be chipper and announcery-like while Phil looked like he was trying to shit a 30-pound watermelon sideways out his American turd-cutter.

[WestcoastVol]

The Pat Washington booth at Platinum Plus.

Rick Clausen teabagging Phil on national TV after that crazy post-Katrina LSU game.

The first studio shot after the opening credits of The Phillip Fulmer Show after an ass-waxing when Kesling would try to be chipper and announcery-like while Phil looked like he was trying to shit a 30-pound watermelon sideways out his American turd-cutter.

[Boo Bird]

Most of my top ten have already been covered, but I can't believe these have not been mentioned:

1) When he looked like he was actually going to puke at the end of the 2005 Vandy game (the aforementioned bent-over, hands on knees routine, but he actually started spitting up). Does anyone remember this?

2) I know this was already partially referenced, but even with Ainge's injury, the Vols still should have beaten Notre Dame at home in 2004. The Irish sucked that year. Willingham was fired at the end of the season, but at least he can say he beat Tennessee at Neyland.

3) The narrow escapes versus inferior non-conference opponents, this was a Fulmer specialty. Here are a few examples that come to mind, just from 2000 going forward: Southern Miss and Memphis (2000), Marshall (2003), UAB and Memphis (The "Perfect Storm" season of 2005), Air Force (2006) and last but not least, Northern Illinois last season. Did I exclude any others?

4) The back-to-back muggings in the fuckin' Peach Bowl, with Maryland and Clemson doing the honors.

5) Getting out-coached by Jo Pa in the Outback Bowl after the 2006 season, even though Jo Pa wasn't even on the sidelines (he was just sitting in the coaches' box and looking grouchy).

[TheDeeble]

Almost forgot, Jonathan Hefney laughing as he ran by an upset Fulmer after fumbling a punt I think.

[GhenghisVol]

Million, that is just fucking right fucking on! Thankee.

[GhenghisVol]

Clappy McFatass? hahahahahahahaahahahahaha gag whock choke ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

[GhenghisVol]

Having two of his RBs suspended for parts of the 07 Bama game by Kurkie Rupert and not even knowing about it.


OMG, I had almost forgotten about all the "communication" problems Flummo had with his staff, particularly Sanders and who was the RB coach that told the press that Riggs was going to start, then they asked Flummo and he said "Houston will start." hahahahaha what a CLUSTERFUCK!!!

[englishvol]

Ghengis do you ever sleep your schedule seems about the same as mine , benadyrl shooters all around :bouncy:

[Gravedigger]

Three words sums up his career "Work Like Heck"
This statement addresses the issue of him needeing to work but the use of the word "Heck" tells you that he is too much of a pussy to ever get it done! Can you ever see CLK saying "HECK"?

[AtlantaVol]

Most of my top ten have already been covered, but I can't believe these have not been mentioned:

1) When he looked like he was actually going to puke at the end of the 2005 Vandy game (the aforementioned bent-over, hands on knees routine, but he actually started spitting up). Does anyone remember this?

2) I know this was already partially referenced, but even with Ainge's injury, the Vols still should have beaten Notre Dame at home in 2004. The Irish sucked that year. Willingham was fired at the end of the season, but at least he can say he beat Tennessee at Neyland.

3) The narrow escapes versus inferior non-conference opponents, this was a Fulmer specialty. Here are a few examples that come to mind, just from 2000 going forward: Southern Miss and Memphis (2000), Marshall (2003), UAB and Memphis (The "Perfect Storm" season of 2005), Air Force (2006) and last but not least, Northern Illinois last season. Did I exclude any others? Both Duke and Rutgers almost beat Philapotamous in around 2002 season.

4) The back-to-back muggings in the fuckin' Peach Bowl, with Maryland and Clemson doing the honors. I think it was the Clems Son game where team Captain Kevin Burnett lost his cool and got rat-a-tat Personal Foul penalty's. Instead of benching his ass, Phildo patted him on the ass and put him right back in the game. Molder of Men my ass!!!

5) Getting out-coached by Jo Pa in the Outback Bowl after the 2006 season, even though Jo Pa wasn't even on the sidelines (he was just sitting in the coaches' box and looking grouchy).

See above.

[BrassVols]

Actually that was Trooper who Fulmer did that to. Nice Bus Job by Fulmer on that one.

[BrassVols]

Rick Clausen teabagging Phil on national TV after that crazy post-Katrina LSU game.


Good one Westie! Can't believe I overlooked that one.

[RockyTopCam]

After reading another thread I can't believe this hasn't been mentioned.

The fucking squib kick against Georgia then the hob nail boot comment by that Georgia announcer.

How was this guy the coach for 17 years? I blame it all on Coach Cut.

[Chiutfan]

http://www.newraleigh.com/images/articles/emptyKKboxes.jpg




enough said